As a woman approaching 50 and a nutrition professional, midlife is definitely a topic of conversation. The world is changing. We are changing.
For those of us who are parents, we are helping our teenagers and adult kids navigate a time of life that is also full of change, decisions and uncertainty. Isn’t it though, also full of hope? Nebulous, unformed, juicy, full of possibility, potential?
We are watching our parents age and many of them are not aging well. We are tasked with taking care of them in ways we maybe never thought we would. I often wonder, is this my fate? Dementia, incontinence, isolation, unable to move through the world as I once did?
While these outcomes might be common to ageing, they aren’t normal. From everything I have learned and observed, there is absolutely a different way. And still that fear and sadness for my parents is heavy.
We have a foot in both worlds: new beginnings and endings. I have thought the timing of this stage of life absurd, trying to juggle it all, but maybe there is a divine design. We walk in both worlds to keep us from landing in despair. To keep the flame of hope alive.
I know so many people in midlife who want to “feel like themselves again”. Confident and self-assured. Happy. Vibrant.
They don’t want to feel this impending doom, worry, and succumb to worst case scenario thinking.
Not to mention achy, hot for no reason, full of rage, and not as quick as they once were mentally.
They want to feel engaged in the world. That they matter. That this matters. It wasn’t all for naught.
And I wonder…while it is true that there is infinitely more on the line at this age, more to worry about, isn’t that what we have been striving for all along? People to love and to love us back. Projects, endeavors, work that we cared about deeply and poured ourselves into.
How do we live into this next season not constantly worried about losing it all, while also knowing this isn’t all ours to keep?
How do we live with confidence, levity, a sense of peace? With hopeful anticipation for what is next? With a sense of “I can handle whatever comes my way”. With grace.
Please do not confuse grace with perfection. Grace can be everything from finding an inner strength you didn’t know was there to crying on the bathroom floor. Again. Sometimes that's exactly where we find this strength.
These next decades, if we are lucky, can be full of joy and freedom. New experiences. Full of connections to others. A whole new connection to ourselves. A better connection if we take the time to foster this.
So many of us parents are doing this work on an island. Yes, perhaps we have friends, family and community, but feelings of isolation are real. We are often doing it without enough support. Maybe we struggle with asking for help. We have all had our own family struggles, obstacles, and lessons that brought us to our knees.
So many of us have dealt with impossible life situations.
And yet.
We are finding out what we are made of. What we are capable of. Whether it’s parenting, careers, or life, we have pushed ourselves and been pushed further than we thought possible. We have experienced so much. We have failed. We have lost. Over and over again.
There has also been immense love and beauty. And we keep going.
Can this lived life fuel these next decades? A stronger, more whole sense of who we are and what we want. And most importantly, a deep knowing of what matters.
I think it can. It has to. But it has to be intentional. Thoughtful. We have to learn from the past. Not use it against ourselves.
We have to learn how to take care of ourselves in meaningful ways. How to take care of each other.
There is so much we can do everyday to pave the way for hope and possibility. For levity and joy. For feeling confident and alive.
There is not one path, one right answer.
It will take work and discovery. Isn’t this the Hero’s Journey? Coming home to ourselves. Broken and beaten but fortified. Prepared to forge onward. Open. Ready for all of it.
And what is more exciting than a journey? Nebulous, unformed, juicy, full of possibility, potential. Are you ready?
As a nutrition therapist, I can help you navigate the daily food, lifestyle, and mindset choices that have a profound impact on your health and wellness.
As a friend, we can help each other through the rest of it.
With love,
Angie
AWN
720-205-8481
Comments